The Unfuckable Man's War Against Freedom and Beauty
A "hardcore" rant incoming.
During my sojourn through right-wing media the last 15 years, so often I came across totally fake issues that tiny cohorts in the conservative movements obsessed over, nurturing Paris Hilton-style like demented Chihuahuas in their lobbyist purses.
One of these snapping critters that seemed at least more cute than the others was this obsession over many countries and individuals not having as many kids as previous generations and the great calamity this presents, an outright apocalypse apparently.
When there are terrorist groups plotting bombings and humans stuck in oubliettes in gulags and dungeons around the globe, worrying about how things might be generations from now was never the most pressing concern for me and it still isn't.
"How can we get more people to fuck" just doesn't seem as pressing a problem as "fuck, we need more people to care about the global war against free societies and the simultaneous genocides waged by Russia against Ukraine, China against the Uyghurs, and Iran against the Jews."
However, now having pondered this "issue" which has seemingly vexed even the wealthiest man in the world, I have come to a very simple solution, and dare I say one that is deeply feminist:
The primary impediment in this world to more babies being born is the greater prevalence of unfuckable men.
And what is this term, this vulgarity that I unleash so shamelessly: an "unfuckable man"?
I'll provide a simple definition: a man who has not done sufficient self-improvement work on himself to inspire women to want to have sex with him, and certainly not to bear his children.
Ladies, pardon me for a moment, allow me to address a particular segment of the "male community" for a moment, a minority of us certainly, but one which for whatever reason has failed to learn a foundational lesson on manhood that the majority of us figured out at 13 or 15 tops:
Hello, self-defined "incels," angry that women do not want to have sex with you, resentful that supposedly only some cartoon jock "Chads" are supposedly attractive to all women.
Here's a tip: it is entirely on you to make yourself attractive enough physically, emotionally, psychologically, professionally, and financially to inspire a woman to want to have sex with you. Being "unfuckable" is the default state of all males. We are supposed to work very hard to evolve from boy to man in order for women to want to jump into bed with us.
Why is something so obvious like this now some sort of "hot take" or "controversial polemic"?
Is it because what was common sense generations ago, has eroded so deeply now that we can see it in the actual numbers of young people not involved in relationships, and the higher numbers of dissatisfied young women today?
Or how about if maybe it's more simple than this and in a sense even more insidious?
Here's a thesis to consider: what if the primary reason why a lot of men (particularly younger men) are less interested in making themselves fuckable, fuck-worthy—or in 1990s parlance, "sponge-worthy"—because they are content with jerking off to the endless country buffet of internet pornography?
Now, I'm not here to shame any of the men here about their porn usage.
I'm simply going to suggest this:
What if the man who stays content with masturbation instead of directing his sexuality into pleasing a woman, actually doesn't mature emotionally, psychologically, and even intellectually?
What if the extreme widespread proliferation of the ability to jerk off to infinite porn from one's handheld device, has in turn increased the number of men who choose to embrace that as their lifestyle and mentality because it is so much easier than having to do the work of being an attractive enough person that a woman would want to mate with you and then sustain a long-term relationship?
In previous pieces I've written in support of the
Anxious Generation thesis that excessive smartphone use psychologically impaired a generation. One can interpret this as an expression of that, except it goes far beyond just Gen-Z. Any man can choose to slip into a teenage boy world of porn and video games when creating a family and living in the real world is so much harder.I'm not sure there's really a "solution" here to a larger and larger segment of the male population which prefers jerking off to having sex.
Surely at no time in male history has this ever been an argument that an older generation of men has had to make to the younger one.
"Come on guys! It's worth it! Make yourself a decent guy and the sex is going to be awesome!"
What the hell? Have we really reached the point now in which this argument has to be made? Perhaps it has in 2025 in the America of President Donald Trump, whose name has now been confirmed to appear in the Epstein files.
Yes, I'm just going to say it now:
Donald Trump is the ultimate unfuckable man
He has to pay women to fuck him. Melania has admitted that she's only with him because of his money. And we all know how much he paid Stormy Daniels. Gee, I wonder what the "wonderful secret" was that Trump shared with that other ultimate unfuckable man, Jeffrey Epstein?
Now here's a further theory to consider: what if the world is largely made chaotic, cruel and painful because of these unfuckable men? What if much of the evil in the world is simply because weak, pathetic men have not done the work to make it so women want to fuck them?
What if the unfuckable man is the real historical instigator of the successive wars against freedom and beauty across all of human history?
I should probably stop now before stretching out a theory about young men jerking off too much into an elaborate cosmology of the universe. Everything doesn't always need to link back to Ancient Egypt.
This made me laugh out loud, although it really shouldn’t have. My favorite unf*able man move, is when guys show up at church and expect that by announcing they believe in Jesus some woman will want to have their children 🤔🤷🏻♀️
I completely agree that young people are hooking up less at least partially because of easy access to internet pornography. It's not internet pornography it's the fact that it's extremely easy to access all the time. Also certain types of internet pornography add the also often toxic parasocial relationships that replace actual relationships.
With that being said I think it goes beyond all this. It's difficult and awkward for a lot of people to find a partner. Back in the late 1990s when I was a teenager there were not as many instant distractions and there was more bordum eventually one would get so desperate they would have to do something like strike up a conversation with a girl your age or even ask someone out on a date. People also hung out in person with other bored young people and those young people knew other young people end you would hear through the grape vine that some girl "likes you" which would lead to you "talking" with this said girl which would the lead to "hanging out" which would then lead to a relationship or sex.
Since social relationships are less robust this type of "I heard it through the grapevine" dating is a thing of the past. Instead younger people are using dating apps which gives the illusion of "so many options"
The fact is that many, many people when I was young "settled" for someone just because they were desperate and had no other options. People now instead of going that route end up distracting themselves with video games TV or porn all of which are more customizable and easier to access. This filling the void more.
The real culprit which porn is part of is the fact that people are not longer bored and can fill any void they have in their life with any number of unhealthy coping mechanisms. This has warped people's attitudes. On top of that the constant comparisons that social media inflicts and the rotten ideas it spreads mean people even men have higher standards for partners even as people both men and women honestly put less effort into their appearance.
Young men do get the short end of the stick in dating apps as well but this is also self inflicted. Many men want to "get laid" they swipe on every girl on their dating app and go for a "quantity over quality" approach. There are more men on dating apps as well. Many men do not want to actually have a long term relationship with the women they swipe on, they will use every manipulative tactic in the book just to have sex. On top of that far more men are on these apps. Women are far more picky(why wouldn't you be if there were so many dishonest men around?) and have a numerical advantage. They can have their pick if they just want to have sex. If they want a relationship they are in a totally vulnerable position of permanent distrust and skepticism for good reason. However this dynamic leads to a very few select group of men getting a lot of attention and most men being ignored because the more picky women gravitate towards the same men. This situation is bad for most men and most women.
So that's the terrible dating scene as I, a married for 14 years guy sees it.
People not having as many kids is mostly due to smart decisions and following the advice of our parents. "Don't have kids until you can afford them" means for most "responsible" people that you establish a career and are financially sound before you have kids (not me) this leads to more kids happening for people in their 30s. If you don't start a family until your 30s you are much more likely to have just one or two kids. This is the primary reason birth rates are down. People are more responsible. People also have longer prolonged adolescence through their 20s often times. This is combination of different cultural expectations and economic reality.
People are still having kids just far fewer of them. That's not necessarily bad as more resources can be put into these fewer kids and less families are in poverty.
Millennials and Gen Z were told "don't have kids until you can afford them" now some people are freaking out because people are actually following that advice.