Exactly the reason I made the same decision. Unfortunately, I think the majority of seniors cannot afford to make such a move. It is cheaper to live on a cruise ship than at an independent living place.
What a thoughtfull and inspiring approach to aging! Your emphasis on planning while you still have agency rather than waiting for crisis is wisdom more people need to hear. The observation that true independance means freedom to focus on what matters, not clinging to burdens, completley reframes how we think about senior living. This piece should be required reading for anyone approaching retirement age.
In a small Texas town a nice assisted living one bedroom apt is almost $3.5 thousand pm. If you have a phone service.. a car.. all extra. Not an option for most people I would imagine
Thank you for sharing this. It is meaningful and well written. It offers a perspective that many people often miss. There is no "one size fits all" solution for any of us as we age. However, the one articulated by the author may help others consider whether it is an approach they may wish to consider, at least at some point in their lives.
Unsaid is this all depends on money. It costs a great deal to live and be treated well at a high quality senior living facility. The more disabled the higher the cost. Not for many people is this close to doable. I’ve seen this up close.
I certainly can't afford it! I plan to take my own life when I can no longer take care of myself in my own home. I have no family and essentially no savings. I simply WILL NOT live in one of those dreadful places funded by Medicaid (assuming that there even is Medicaid when I would need it).
My wife and I are in our 80s. We have lived in our home for almost 50 years. Both of Our children and their families live within 3 miles of us. I always thought that we would age in place. As our friends and expanded family members began to age some became unable to handle the normal vicissitudeses of life. Alzhimers, chronic health issues and the like. We began to notice that theses people had not made plans for their dependant situations. One spouse might have to carry the entire load. Every waking moment caring for the their spouse. Unable to do anything but survive. And when they needed to move to a facility they could not. For a variety of reasons. Some senior centers will not accept someone who can not live independently. Some more affordable centers have a 5 to 10 year waiting list. Some people are not able cognitively to make a decision. It became obvious to us that when one needs to make the decision to move, it cannot be made when it has to be made. So we are moving to a senior center soon. Still able to live independently. And with the right to have end of life services available. I know that we are fortunate to be wealthy. That we are blessed. We were savvy financial investors. I earned a large salary. And we saved for the moment. I know that most others can not do what we are able to do. However that is not a reason not to do it. So make the decision now when you can. Trust me you can't make it when you are forced to do so.
I'm not interested. I have worked hard at protecting my health my whole life. My ancestors were long-lived people who lived in their rural homes into their 80s and 90s. I intend to do the same, with my garden, orchard, vineyard, clean air, wild critters and neighbors who care. If I die here, no big deal. BTW, I've been retired for 13 years. I'm ready for the next 13. And more, I hope. The corporate community prepares us for dependency. Don't let them.
This was a rich folks post. Soon a chronic disease, stroke or cancer will come for one of them. I already have been there losing my wife to cancer and living with RA myself. I have explicitly defined for myself what I am willing to live with and informed my wonderful loving children. My tolerance sure as hell doesn’t include an assisted living facility. When the time comes (soon) I’ll go as neatly as I can manage. Individual lives end. I had a good run.
I’m 80. Just about all of my friends are younger. I think o f myself as much younger. Thinking makes it so. Clint Eastwood said a big part of staying young is not letting the old man in. Planning to be old makes it so.
I can still throw the football…and the baseball accurately from first base. Some people think I’m still in. my 60s. I think I’m in my fifties. Furthermore, I’ve heard that salad bars. are mediocre in senior centers. I still shovel my own snow…can fly on a bike….all that said, I do respect my elders and still like to fish with my Dad who is slowing down a bit.
Exactly the reason I made the same decision. Unfortunately, I think the majority of seniors cannot afford to make such a move. It is cheaper to live on a cruise ship than at an independent living place.
What a thoughtfull and inspiring approach to aging! Your emphasis on planning while you still have agency rather than waiting for crisis is wisdom more people need to hear. The observation that true independance means freedom to focus on what matters, not clinging to burdens, completley reframes how we think about senior living. This piece should be required reading for anyone approaching retirement age.
Must be nice to have money .
In a small Texas town a nice assisted living one bedroom apt is almost $3.5 thousand pm. If you have a phone service.. a car.. all extra. Not an option for most people I would imagine
Thank you for sharing this. It is meaningful and well written. It offers a perspective that many people often miss. There is no "one size fits all" solution for any of us as we age. However, the one articulated by the author may help others consider whether it is an approach they may wish to consider, at least at some point in their lives.
Unsaid is this all depends on money. It costs a great deal to live and be treated well at a high quality senior living facility. The more disabled the higher the cost. Not for many people is this close to doable. I’ve seen this up close.
My first thought when I saw this.
I certainly can't afford it! I plan to take my own life when I can no longer take care of myself in my own home. I have no family and essentially no savings. I simply WILL NOT live in one of those dreadful places funded by Medicaid (assuming that there even is Medicaid when I would need it).
My wife and I are in our 80s. We have lived in our home for almost 50 years. Both of Our children and their families live within 3 miles of us. I always thought that we would age in place. As our friends and expanded family members began to age some became unable to handle the normal vicissitudeses of life. Alzhimers, chronic health issues and the like. We began to notice that theses people had not made plans for their dependant situations. One spouse might have to carry the entire load. Every waking moment caring for the their spouse. Unable to do anything but survive. And when they needed to move to a facility they could not. For a variety of reasons. Some senior centers will not accept someone who can not live independently. Some more affordable centers have a 5 to 10 year waiting list. Some people are not able cognitively to make a decision. It became obvious to us that when one needs to make the decision to move, it cannot be made when it has to be made. So we are moving to a senior center soon. Still able to live independently. And with the right to have end of life services available. I know that we are fortunate to be wealthy. That we are blessed. We were savvy financial investors. I earned a large salary. And we saved for the moment. I know that most others can not do what we are able to do. However that is not a reason not to do it. So make the decision now when you can. Trust me you can't make it when you are forced to do so.
I'm not interested. I have worked hard at protecting my health my whole life. My ancestors were long-lived people who lived in their rural homes into their 80s and 90s. I intend to do the same, with my garden, orchard, vineyard, clean air, wild critters and neighbors who care. If I die here, no big deal. BTW, I've been retired for 13 years. I'm ready for the next 13. And more, I hope. The corporate community prepares us for dependency. Don't let them.
This was a rich folks post. Soon a chronic disease, stroke or cancer will come for one of them. I already have been there losing my wife to cancer and living with RA myself. I have explicitly defined for myself what I am willing to live with and informed my wonderful loving children. My tolerance sure as hell doesn’t include an assisted living facility. When the time comes (soon) I’ll go as neatly as I can manage. Individual lives end. I had a good run.
I’m 80. Just about all of my friends are younger. I think o f myself as much younger. Thinking makes it so. Clint Eastwood said a big part of staying young is not letting the old man in. Planning to be old makes it so.
I can still throw the football…and the baseball accurately from first base. Some people think I’m still in. my 60s. I think I’m in my fifties. Furthermore, I’ve heard that salad bars. are mediocre in senior centers. I still shovel my own snow…can fly on a bike….all that said, I do respect my elders and still like to fish with my Dad who is slowing down a bit.